she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
