Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Randomize
