Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize