Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
She bit a glass in half.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Randomize
