just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Randomize
