Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
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