I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
