i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize
