Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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