For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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