i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
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