I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
