Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
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