dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Randomize
