if you like me you must not know who I am
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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