I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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