amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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