I feel like abortions should bother me more
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
