If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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