Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize
