Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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