i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Randomize
