Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I think I just sharted jello shots
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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