She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize
