Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
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