hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
