She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Randomize
