that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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