I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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