I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
