just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
