Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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