Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
lol hangovers are for mortals.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
