People with herpes should wear stickers.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
