I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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