6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
