3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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