My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
