he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
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