you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
