i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Randomize
