and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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