my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
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