dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
