Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
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