sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
