On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
When are your genitals available?
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
