Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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