Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
wanna go halves on a baby?
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
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