i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize